Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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