His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
A+ Viking dick
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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