you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
