no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
