he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I am one with the molecules
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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