"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
