Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
