Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
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