i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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