I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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