My nipple is on Facebook.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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