i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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