Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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