it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
He felt like a one man threesome
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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