That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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