He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
