Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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