I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
