i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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