I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I love having hate sex.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
