i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize