as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
