not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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