She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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