Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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