this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
