Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
