Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize