Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
