I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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