at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
