and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
You took a bar mat shot.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
