we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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