I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize