Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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