And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
