Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
