Christians are straight up FREAKS
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize
