I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
