He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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