You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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