what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
