Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
