I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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