Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
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