He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
