bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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