Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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