And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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