I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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