Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Randomize