well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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